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In many other ways he is also fantastic: he owns several properties, has several degrees in engineering, has managed to find a job where he has ample time for extracurricular activities, maintains a close network of friends, maintains a humble self-perspective, and seems thrilled to be with me: he helps me with things that are difficult (both family strife and car repairs!

), enjoys meeting my friends and family; he’s introduced me to his friends and some of his family (with whom he has a very complicated relationship).

Speaking of red/orange/yellow flags, what imperfections can exist in a person without them being any sort traffic light coloured flags?But, as someone with an anxious-frightened attachment style, this can be particularly provoking for me.He is always open and available to speak about my needs and feelings – but is not always equipped to handle my expressions.After 4-6 weeks of dating, I’ve been in an exclusive relationship with a man 4 years my junior (I am 36) who has had some significant struggles in his life: he is aware of their impacts and is actively addressing them – most recently leaving a relationship that had activated some of his own issues.As someone who has overcome my own history of dysfunctional family life and personal strife, I admire his commitment to his own health, and empathize with his journey.

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