How does a dad deal with a dating dauaghter

Pithy parables or intimidating mandates or climactic conversation (really) can be helpful, but so much more can be accomplished over time together.

Let your first couple conversations be about him, and not her. Study his relationships with his friends and family.

Nothing will help you discern if this young man can love your daughter more clearly than a relationship.

And nothing will be better for him long term, whether or not he marries her.

Trade distant, hands-off fear tactics for some faithful, down-to-earth discipleship.

If you talk to some Christian dads of daughters, you’d think every young man was a drug lord, pimp, or terrorist. Dad might have the perception that every man is a walking caricature of the most discouraging trends today: laziness, selfishness, sexual immorality, entitlement, and worse.

dad might have an unbalanced or unfair standard: the guy who graduated top of his class at the age of eleven, started his own business, built the brand-new building for his church, and single-handedly rescued a third-world country from a corrupt regime (or something like that).

Dad might unfairly be expecting a lifetime of wisdom, maturity, independence, or faith from a twentysomething.

Either way, fathers need to hear that there are lots of young men who have believed the gospel, have been rescued from much of the worldliness around them, are demonstrating trajectories of the fruit of the Spirit, but are still immature.

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If discipleship — or “dating” your daughter’s boyfriend — sounds like it might be a more effective method than what you’ve tried (or intended to try), here are six pieces of counsel for engaging young men interested in your little girl.

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